Romans 6:22, "...and having become slaves of God..."
God is using Timothy to teach us what it means to be slaves of Christ. We no longer live for ourselves, but are completely and thoroughly devoted to this stewardship with which He has entrusted us. I Corinthians says our lives are not our own, we were bought with a price - the cost of Christ's blood. Now that it is time to take up our cross as we follow Him, are we willing to do it thankfully and joyfully? His Word says that joy comes not from living for ourselves, but from loving others.
Right before Timothy was born, I was asking God what it meant to rely on His strength and not my own. Now, I am in a place where it is impossible not to do so. Each day I am faced with my own weakness and given the opportunity to turn to God and ask for His power to be made perfect. He is faithful and always answers.
We are also beginning to understand that there are two sides to humility, both of which are reflected in the free gift of eternal life given by God to helpless sinners: one side which comes from giving, and the other side which comes from receiving, what cannot be repaid. The enemy constantly tries to fill my heart with indebtedness to those who have selflessly given to our family in our time of need, for we have not the means to repay. How could we? Every moment of every day is filled with Timothy's care. And Timothy himself, at least now, does not thank or laud us or give back to us in return. We serve Timothy as slaves of the Lord, trusting by faith that He sees our love for Timothy, and that He will reward us in heaven, as He will also reward those who have loved us. And is this not how God is most glorified?
There is a picture of Timothy in the NICU in which my hands are firmly and yet gently placed on his little body, letting him know that he is not alone in his suffering. As I look at that picture, I see that God is using my hands to comfort him, that through my hands He is being Timothy's strong, loving protector. How humbled, and honored, I am to be God's vessel of compassion to my son. This is what it means to be Christ's slave: to be used of God, by His strength, to love others. This is what it means to experience true joy. This is what it means to know the love of God.
Thank you, Lord, for giving us Timothy, to teach us to honor You.
